Cedric Nettles Senior Editor
I was bullied growing up, I was also bullied in my military career. If you are a young man or young lady I know exactly how you feel…You walk to your desk, you just want to get the class done.That one person or one clique is waiting on you to sit down. Suddenly you are the source for a lot of jokes, unflattering things said about your family, and no one has your back. I don’t even want to go into being the only child.
1 out of 4 kids are Bullied. 77% of students are bullied mentally, verbally, & physically. Cyberbullying statistics are rapidly approaching similar numbers, with 43% experiencing cyberbullying. … Each day 160,000 students miss school for fear of being bullied.
As an adult you think it would stop… Not necessarily …You see these same bullies as kids grow up to be corporate leaders, and not to mention leaders of the free world. They attack your livelihood, reputation, and sanity and will do so with no chill. You switched from a classroom desk to a cubical with the same toxic environment.
Stop letting people give you their backsides to kiss.. They can tell you to lay down and you won’t even do that right,fast enough or good enough. HOLD YOUR HEAD UP…If you got favor on your life, use it to help others.
Getting bullied is like having an open cage door you know that is open, but choose not to fly through it. It causes stress like you would not believe, and affects your confidence levels. As I overcame my own insecurities through my own journey I had to learn to truly be who I was. Not to mention speak those things of who I am and what I am as if i had them already. I have been hearing that “you are not this, or not that all my life” and was hell bent on proving people wrong. Once I start speaking (then achieving) I realized something…You cannot say the right things to the wrong people anymore than you can say the wrong things to the right people who are assigned to you…Who get you…That see why you do the things you do. In most cases you care so much for people you won’t do impulsive things that narrow minded people deem as fear, or being something you are not.
I don’t blame myself for being bullied, I blamed myself for wallowing in self pity. People will accept you at your own appraisal. If you don’t have the intestinal fortitude to tell them who you are and where you are going, the abuser will gladly fill in the blank to ensure you feel as miserable as them.
You say “this”…”No you are not you are “that.” Stop letting people give you their backsides to kiss.. They can tell you to lay down and you won’t even do that right,fast enough or good enough. HOLD YOUR HEAD UP…If you got favor on your life! Bullies love to control you when they are not in control of their own lives.
I don’t blame myself for being bullied, I blamed myself for wallowing in self pity. People will accept you at your own appraisal. If you don’t have the intestinal fortitude to tell them who you are and where you are going, the abuser will gladly fill in the blanks to ensure you feel as miserable as them. I will tell you this one thing to do that will liberate you…Forgive. I am a Christian, and being one is not a euphemism for being a doormat. You can’t keep drinking poison and hope it hurts them. Ask for the capacity to be sympathetic and be an ambassador of what you profess. If you are the bullied, use that pain to push you to higher levels and not internalize it… If you are the bullier, sit down and talk to someone you trust to get your pain out.
Keep pressing through and the right people will gravitate to you. Actress Maria Howell (The Color Purple, The Hunger Games, Hidden Figures, Saints & Sinners) wrote the forward for Torrential Waters. Having mentors like my publicist Tam Lawrence and Maria helped get through to my next level. So to the abused and abuser alike, find a mentor! We have to submit our egos to someone.
I wrote Torrential Waters that talks about bullying and peer pressure and to show the darker side of the abuser and the abused. My work illustrates real life situations our youth face. Let’s love on one another in peace.